California Hating
Este post é retirado de um livro de um cómico de seu nome Bill Maher. O livro é um fantástico presente de Natal e como tal ofereci-o ao meu Pai. Infelizmente o livro continua aqui por casa por abrir. Eu antes de o oferecer já o tinha lido. Claro que não o comprei, li e ofereci! (Muito embora este padrão de actuação não me seja completamente estranho) Neste caso eu li o livro na Barnes and Noble (estilo FNAC) e depois achei que seria uma excelente compra de Natal.
De qualquer forma o importante é que o Bill Maher vivia nos gelados Estados do Leste até que viu a luz e veio viver para a Sunny California. Uma das coisas que os bárbaros, que habitam nos restantes Estados, gostam de fazer é dizer mal da California. Aqui está a sua defesa.
New Rule
Lay off California. The rest of America loves to laugh at crazy California but let´s remember this: California has a lot of people. And the reason it does is that lots of people from other states end up saying, "Fuck this, I´m outta here" and then they come here, where people ask them, "Don't you miss the winters?" No, strangely enough, I don´t, just like I don't miss a car door slamming on my hand.
Make fun of California, but if it weren´t for California, East Coast rappers would have to shoot musicians form Branson. If it weren't for California, there'd be almost no TV, and you'd have to go home at night and actually talk to your family.
We elected Ronald Reagan and Jerry Brown. We're home to Disney and also to Hustler. The Partridge Family and the Manson Family, We can drink a Mudslide and Sex on the Beach during an actual Mudslide while having sex on the beach. Our farms feed the world and Calista Flockhart lives here.
We have bears and the great white sharks and even our washed-up actors are allowed to kill one blond chick. We invented surfing and cyberporn and LSD and the boob job. And if we didn't we would have. We have a real hockey team named after a hockey team in a movie. We give our illegal aliens driver's licenses.
Would anywhere else in America trade places with LA or San Francisco in a piss-soaked New York minute? You bet they would because I don't recall anyone writing a song called "I Wish They All Could Be Rhode Island Girls."
De qualquer forma o importante é que o Bill Maher vivia nos gelados Estados do Leste até que viu a luz e veio viver para a Sunny California. Uma das coisas que os bárbaros, que habitam nos restantes Estados, gostam de fazer é dizer mal da California. Aqui está a sua defesa.
New Rule
Lay off California. The rest of America loves to laugh at crazy California but let´s remember this: California has a lot of people. And the reason it does is that lots of people from other states end up saying, "Fuck this, I´m outta here" and then they come here, where people ask them, "Don't you miss the winters?" No, strangely enough, I don´t, just like I don't miss a car door slamming on my hand.
Make fun of California, but if it weren´t for California, East Coast rappers would have to shoot musicians form Branson. If it weren't for California, there'd be almost no TV, and you'd have to go home at night and actually talk to your family.
We elected Ronald Reagan and Jerry Brown. We're home to Disney and also to Hustler. The Partridge Family and the Manson Family, We can drink a Mudslide and Sex on the Beach during an actual Mudslide while having sex on the beach. Our farms feed the world and Calista Flockhart lives here.
We have bears and the great white sharks and even our washed-up actors are allowed to kill one blond chick. We invented surfing and cyberporn and LSD and the boob job. And if we didn't we would have. We have a real hockey team named after a hockey team in a movie. We give our illegal aliens driver's licenses.
Would anywhere else in America trade places with LA or San Francisco in a piss-soaked New York minute? You bet they would because I don't recall anyone writing a song called "I Wish They All Could Be Rhode Island Girls."
posted by Bernardo at
7:51 PM
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4 comments
